What Women Believe Every Woman Should Know About Men

Oscar Crawford Media By Oscar Crawford Media, 28th May 2013 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Family>Relationships

I have learned much about women over the past 40 years. I do not think of myself as an expert on women, yet do consider myself literate and speak woman. Women talk to me. Women talk to me a lot. I intentionally ask this question as I engage women from 18 – 80 in conversation, “What do you know about men? What have you learned about men?”

What Women Believe Every Woman Should Know About Men

I have learned much about women over the past 40 years. I do not think of myself as an expert on women, yet do consider myself literate and speak woman. Women talk to me. Women talk to me a lot.

I intentionally ask this question as I engage women from 18 – 80 in conversation, “What do you know about men? What have you learned about men?” I qualify why I have raised the question.

First, I want to know because I need to be aware of the imagery and thought of men in the mind of the woman I am engaging. It may be that my presence is a reminder of all the men in her life that have brought disrespect, emotional pain, and in some cases physical trauma. This information will be helpful if I am to provide a zone of comfort and security for perceived safe self - disclosure for what she shares.

Second, I want to make every effort to facilitate an environment that allows the woman I am sharing with the experience of knowing that she is the absolute center of my world for the time we are together. I regard it my responsibility to foster an environment of such intense nurture that loving respect is the only perception available to the interaction.

Third, as I have evolved over the decades of my own experience, I note these observations. Women I knew in my twenties were mating or marrying, becoming pregnant and deciding to have children or not. Women I knew in my thirties divorced, married again and moved on. Women I knew in my forties were having hysterectomies, experienced the beginning of menopause, and considered cosmetic surgery. Women I knew in my fifties experienced microwave moments at the speed of light, sought to re – invent themselves, and spend considerable time looking back over their lives.

I have heard more menstrual stories, sexual violence stories, and other horrors acted out on women than I care to admit. On occasion, I have wondered if there were not some sign on my forehead that said to women, “Tell me your story and be relieved of your pain.” This is why I want to know what women know about men.

Without the detail of the backstory on each item listed in this top ten list, this is what every woman over 35 should already know generally about men and what every woman under 35 needs to learn generally about men. There are exceptions to all trends

1. If men think can get away with cheating, they will cheat.
2. Men want to believe they are always large and in charge.
3. Men want to believe they know everything.
4. Men expect sex no matter what.
5. Men often initiate activity they do not continue.
6. Men use, abuse, and will leave youse.
7. Men are messy and expect domestic service.
8. Men are generally not good money managers.
9. Men like the latest and the most expensive toys.
10. Men generally do not develop skills for effective communication with women.

This is not an exhaustive list. You likely have others you believe should be in the top ten. My high hope is that women and men will talk to each other about these things. More than that, my high hope is that we all learn how to love and respect each other in ways that we achieve our relationship wants and needs without causing each other emotional trauma.

Tags

Disrespect, Emotional Pain, Physical Abuse And Trauma, Why Men Cheat, Why Men Lie, Why Men Will Always Cheat

Meet the author

author avatar Oscar Crawford Media
Creative writer and filmmaker, producing content that informs, inspires and entertains. Work focuses on relationship development, writing, and living skills, occasionally political, always spiritual.

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Comments

author avatar writershirley lopez
28th May 2013 (#)

Very well put like the way you summarized

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author avatar Oscar Crawford Media
28th May 2013 (#)

Thank you Ms. Lopez. How can we help people appreciate that being honest an open up front can lead to better relational outcomes?

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