The Story Of The Second Wife!

Brian Njihia By Brian Njihia, 4th May 2016 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Family>Relationships

As a little girl, Anastacia Ngure never dreamt of being a wife. And no, she wasn’t against marriage. “I never had the fairytale fantasy. The white gown, the aisle were just not my thing. Sure I was not living to avoid it, but it wasn’t something worth striving for, she explains.

The Story of The Second Wife

As a little girl, Anastacia Ngure never dreamt of being a wife. And no, she wasn’t against marriage. “I never had the fairytale fantasy. The white gown, the aisle were just not my thing. Sure I was not living to avoid it, but it wasn’t something worth striving for, she explains. Ngure got married at 40. See, in her 20s, she met a man then, in his 30s. A married man and a father of two. “I was less concerned about his marital status because, at 25, I just wanted to have fun. I wasn’t looking for a husband, “she says. Fast forward 15 years and now she is married to him - his second wife. Initially, this never bothered Ngure until her friends asked how it felt being ‘number 2’. “At that age, we were both old enough to make sober decisions. But that doesn’t make me second best or second choice. I’m just his 2nd wife, nothing less,” she explains. You’re isolated But she’s quick to point that being the second wife cannot be smooth all the way, it has its pitfalls. If it so happens that the first wife is fully involved in his life, as is her case, then one would feel isolated more like a spare wheel. “To date, I find myself having to work harder so as to get closer to his family,” she says. Ngure still feels as though the first Wife was favored more. “Now I have all of these people to deal with that I have never bargained for. Honestly, I find it an isolating experience,” she adds. Short lived joy Another; Jacinta Oluoch echoes this statement. For Jacinta, being her husband’s second wife was the most fulfilling role she ever played in her life, albeit for a short While. All the attention was focused on me. Negative or positive? Honestly, I just didn’t care. The first wife had no problem with the arrangement, and we all lived peacefully until I decided to have children. That is where all hell broke loose.” Jacinta was not even supposed to harbour such a thought; he couldn’t afford to have another child because of the children he already had. The first wife was living the life, but I had to scale down my lifestyle as well while he finances hers. It was time to pack up and leave,” she says with finality. Why be a second wife? If the scenarios noted above are anything to go by, then being a second wife is not as happy as many of them want us to think. So, why is the sophisticated modern woman willing to settle for second place? “When she was busy building her independence, the responsible, husband material men were taken. So, when every eligible man she meets spots a ring, what other options does she have? Many are first to throw stones at these women, but isn’t becoming a second wife better? Take a scenario where she has met a man and genuinely fell in love with him, isn’t making their relationship official better than being a mistress? Poses Jackeline Wamunyu, a sociologist. As always the past has a funny way of haunting and repeating itself.Some traditions are embedding and
embracing the modern culture. “Unless the first wife is completely out of the picture, then the second wife will have challenges. She will feel lonely when the husband pays attention to the other family because that attachment cannot be broken second or no second wife,” she says. The second wife should know what she’s signing for before making it official at first. “Before you waste your time, make it clear that you’d also want a family of your own and if he disagrees then you’ll know your place,” Wamunyu says.

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Comments

author avatar Lady Aiyanna
5th May 2016 (#)

Well 99.9% homewreck to become the Second Wife. Like the slut who broke my marriage and got accepted by the mother in law as she was of the same religion only to find her son was still married to me and his homewrecking second wife was just a slut who spread her legs without legitimacy of wedded life or marital certification. We call her the Prostitute the Aussie French Pornstar.
I have no respect for homewreckers. If there is genuinity in the reason why they are marrying again, it would be widowhood or widowerhood but most certainly not sluthood.

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author avatar Lady Aiyanna
5th May 2016 (#)

Older men always like younger women who whore it with ease to uplift their sagging dick. If they are of genuine love, they wait for the lady who is of real love not homewreck to make one.

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