The Process Of Divorce Mediation

Robin Khan By Robin Khan, 19th Apr 2016 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Family>Divorce

Divorce mediation is a process which is growing increasingly popular for divorcing couples. Depending on the state where the couple is filing for divorce, mediation may be court-mandated or voluntary.

The Process

If the couple agrees to negotiate the terms of their divorce through mediation but are not successful in doing so, they may then go forward with litigation and present their case before a judge. There are a number of reasons that it is to the couple’s benefit to use the mediation process successfully so, once it has been agreed to and begun, most will make the effort to negotiate the terms of their divorce successfully.

Some of the Decisions Made during Divorce Mediation

Making the decision to divorce is probably the biggest one you will make. In order for mediation to work effectively, the decision to end the marriage must be mutual. When one spouse does not want a divorce and the other does, there are more likely to be greater areas of conflict and stronger emotions that limits their ability to sit down and work things out.

Mediation takes place outside of the courtroom in an atmosphere of peace and respect. Both spouses need to be devoted to making the most of the opportunity before they are likely to end up reaching a resolution. If couples agree on most issues or at least offer some flexibility, the mediator should be able to find a middle point that will work for everyone involved. A highly disputed divorce is not a good option for divorce mediation. However, if the mediation is court-mandated, couples should make the effort to find common ground and compromises that allow the process to proceed to completion. Mediator David M. Moore explains that he attempts to steer a path toward resolution and get a fair result for all of his clients whenever possible.

The Differences between Litigation and Mediation

Litigation refers to legal action between two or more parties. It takes place in a courtroom with a judge or jury to decide the outcome. Each side has legal representation to submit evidence, question witnesses, and argue the legality of the opposition’s claim. The detailed process of litigation can take days, weeks, months, or years, depending on the specifics of the case and the number and complexity of issues involved. The longer a court case takes; the more money it costs.

When two parties face off in litigation, it is typically an adversarial process. Each side wants to come out the winner. When the case is a divorce, there are often a lot of emotions added to the mix. In reality, many of the arguments that a spouse wants to make have no real value to the case. When the judge rules, it is based on the laws, not on the unique specifics of the case. Although the final decision is often one that neither spouse is happy with, it is binding.

Mediation, on the other hand, is cooperative, peaceful, and respectful. Instead of a courtroom trial, the couple has one or more hearings in a comfortable setting. Both spouses must come to the mediation hearing with a genuine desire to reach a resolution and the willingness to work in a cooperative manner to work out all the issues they are facing.

During the mediation process, the spouses will suggest different options for their dispute and the mediator will guide them through the negotiations. Each issue will be worked out, including the separation of property, child custody and visitation, payment of bills and the management of mutual accounts. One of the advantages of divorce mediation is that the couple must agree on the resolution before the mediator writes the document called the award and the decision becomes final. When it does, it is binding except for special circumstances that may be brought into question later. Both spouses retain equal control over the resolution.

A Less Expensive Way to Get a Divorce

During a divorce case that goes to litigation, each spouse will hire their own attorney. They may, or may not, ask for a retainer up front but many attorneys don’t get paid until the case is settled. While this works as a convenience for those with their money tied up in their divorce case, the final bill can be overwhelming. This is because legal fees can take a large chunk out of your lifetime savings and result in each spouse getting far less money than they expected. By the time the attorney’s 30% is deducted from the amount they are awarded by the judge, they still end up feeling as though they lost the case to a certain degree.

Divorce mediation prevents you from having to pay legal fees to an attorney or court costs. Although some spouses prefer to hire an attorney to represent them if all or some of the issues in the case are complex, hiring a mediator who is also an attorney alleviates the need to pay an additional charge.

While a divorce case may reach well into the thousands before the divorce is granted, mediation services are often offered at a set price. You can usually expect to pay a few hundred dollars instead of the thousands that litigation costs. In addition, there are no hidden costs that come up at the end of the mediation process.

In the Best Interest of the Children

As difficult as it is for the spouses to go through a highly contested divorce, it is even more devastating on the children. Their lives get put on hold while their parents fight out the issues surrounding the divorce, often shuttling them back and forth from one home to the next one. Children are often used as leverage against the other parent. With divorce mediation, there is never a “one spouse takes all” end result that leaves everyone involved unhappy with the outcome. The spouses can focus on providing the children with the custody, visitation, and payments that are necessary to provide them with the best possible care.

More couples are finding that divorce mediation is faster, more cost-efficient way to end their marriage. There are many more advantages, none the least of which is being better parents for your children.

Image Credit: Steve


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author avatar Enoch Davies
26th Dec 2016 (#)

.my wife and I got married 6 years ago and we were so much in love with each other, we have 2 kids(josh and rebecca). One day my wife came back home from her friends place and she told me that she wants us to file for a divorce that she's no longer interested in our marriage, i was surprise and everything seem to me like a joke. after then i tried all my best to get her back but there was no way. but to no avail, my heart was broken, i wondered whats happening .i was on facebook when i saw a post on how Dr Ewan helped a lady to bring back her lost husband. i was scared but because i love my wife so much and I am ready to do anything to bring her back. I decided to give it a try by contacting him via, So when i contacted him i narrated everything to him and he said my case is not a serious one that my husband will come back to me within 18 hours if i believe in his power.he told me to do some things to do which i did before 18 hours, my wife called me on phone and was crying for forgiveness. right now we are now a new branded family with more happiness, we are even going on vacation on xmas. please if any one of you out there is passing through same issue in your marriage, relationship issues contact Dr Ewan today or call or add him on whatsapp on +234905735398 or check out his webpage contact him today on now.
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author avatar Jack Titchener
28th Jul 2017 (#)

I really like the idea of eliminating the additional charge of one more lawyer by having a mediator. My wife and I are getting a divorce, and since we don't have any complicated legal issues, we have been thinking about getting a mediator for a cheaper settlement. Thank you so much for the helpful legal advice!

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9th Oct 2017 (#)


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21st Dec 2017 (#)

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14th Jan 2018 (#)

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15th Jan 2018 (#)

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7th Feb 2018 (#)

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3rd Apr 2018 (#)

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