Raising one's children

Milton Bruce By Milton Bruce, 7th Jun 2011 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Family>Kids

The article shows some drawbacks of raising children by one single parent.

Single Parents or Married Families?

Today it is common for children to be raised by just one of their parents. Studies shows that single parents exert weaker controls and make fewer demands on their children than married families do. There is a real easy explanation for this problem, it is the simple fact that two parents together make more rules and are more likely to stick by those rules than single parents are .
Single parents are not able to show the same emotions as married couples can, because the love between a mother and a father plays an important part in a family. Children learn how to love from their parents, but if both parents are not there to teach them how to love, their love might be somewhat one-sided. Yes, single parents can show their love toward their children, but they have no spouse to express love to. Children from single parent families are therefore denied that learning experience of how a husband and a wife should love one another.

Gender also plays an important role in families. Men and women have very different characteristics, both emotionally and physically. These different characteristics contribute to their roles as mothers and fathers (Curtin et al. 369). For instance, men are normally much stronger physically than women, and are therefore able to do many things around the house that a woman can not. Women are much more likely to do the everyday household chores while the man does the heavy duty work. Women usually tend more to the children when they need things than do the men, and also help them more with emotional type problems (Curtin et al. 369). So it is easy to see why having both parents in the household makes a much more well-rounded family atmosphere.

When both parents are not in the household children after experience a great deal of stress from different aspects of their lives. This stress often comes from children who are forced into independence and self-reliance before they are mature enough to cope . Many single parents leave their children at home or send them to low quality day cares centers while they are at work, causing stress on the children . Yes, two parent families often leave their children at home or send them to low quality day cares, but studies show that it is ten times more likely to happen in single parent families.

Single parent homes not only reflect or cause stress upon children, but also upon the parent. Single mothers especially feel stress when a father figure is not present . According to the survey done by Katherine Allen and Peggy Quinn, seventy percent of the single mothers reported that they always worried about money . Not only was money a big issue, but also time and energy. These single mothers are put under pressure from about every aspect of their lives, and without a husband there to help raise a family, pay the bills, and to show them love, the single mother must nearly feel hopeless.

Now we have seen the pressures that single mothers face, but what about single fathers because there are many of them in the world today. One example can be found in the article " A Singular Experience," by Brad Andrews. Andrews himself is a single father and he discusses the overwhelming responsibilities of being a single father. He now has to do all of the household chores and take care of the children all by himself. He can no longer play catch with his son after dinner because now he has to do the dishes . These single parent situations create unstability and do not provide a positive environment for children to grow up in. Both a father and a mother are needed to create a stable environment and a positive place fro children to live.
The simple fact is that being a single parent is a very difficult task, whether it is a single father or a single mother. A family consist of a father and a mother with their children, not just one parent. Single parent homes create a lot of stress and worries on the parent as well as the children, and the stress and worries are not needed by either. After all, it takes two to make a child, it should take two to raise a child.

Tags

Children, Crime, Education, Gender, Household, Married Families, Problem, Rules, Single Parents, Violence

Meet the author

author avatar Milton Bruce
I am a 28 years old man . I am married and I have got one child. I really lead a peaceful life . My hobbies are bowling , reading and of course WRITING. I write about everything because I read everyth

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Comments

author avatar Steve Kinsman
7th Jun 2011 (#)

Very good article. Yet there are cases where it's better to be in a single parent home than in a home with both the mother and father there but where there is heavy abuse - psychological or physical or both - going on between them.

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author avatar lisalatouche
8th Jun 2011 (#)

Thanks for sharing! I am a single mother of two and I totally agree that it can be stressful on many different levels. However, if single parents try to overcome such obstacles and show their children love and responsibility then I am sure they will grow up into balanced adults. Not all nuclear families are very stable. But love and determination goes a long way to nurturing children!

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author avatar satan fury
10th Jun 2011 (#)

This is very good advice. I totally agree with your views in this article.

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author avatar Val Mills
2nd Jul 2011 (#)

As a teacher, I totally agree with you re two parents making more rules, or, as I prefer to think of it, setting more boundaries.

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