Of Bullies and Victims, and Where It's Coming From

Black Butterfly By Black Butterfly, 18th Oct 2014 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Family>Domestic Violence & Abuse

When you see a child being bullied in the street, what is your first reaction? You'll immediately think how bad-manner the bully is. But do you know why the bully becomes a bully and why they do those kinds of things?


Bullying is a serious problem. Being a victim of this kind of act can happen to anyone at any time, even when you least expect it. Just the same, being a bully can also happen to anyone and you will be surprised to know that you already are a bully without you knowing it.

When you see a child being surrounded by bigger children and being laughed at, it's already one example of bullying. Bullying doesn't need physical abuse to be called one. Words cut deeper and it leaves scars that take more time to heal than the physical wounds. Any type of bullying should not be allowed and should be stopped immediately. A person that is being bullied might do things that can worsen the situation and so one should seek help from someone, specially to the professionals.

The Victim

Usually, those who fall victims of bullying are children who have problems in their home. One example is a child whose parents are always arguing and won't even stop even if their children are there and witnessing the exchange of verbal abuse. Because a child cannot have a talk with their parents, they do not have anyone to talk to about their problems. Same goes with children that have parents who are workaholic and do not have time to spend for their children. Those are just a few examples.

And because of those problems at home, they have a very low self esteem. So when someone tries to bully them, they can't even fight back. Worse case scenario is if the bully knows about their problems at home and use them against them.

A bullied person can result to a lot of things that can harm them. Their very low self esteem can even go way downwards. They'll be scared to face more problems that will come their way. They will have trust issues and worse, if the bullying won't stop and they feel like they can't take it anymore, they'll want to escape everything. And by escaping, I mean taking their own life.

The Bully

The bully is the bad guy in this situation. They are those who harm those people who are smaller and weaker than them. If you give them the impression that they can push you and step on you, they'll absolutely do just that. But do you know that some of these bullies are once the victims?

They might have experienced being the one at the receiving end of the bullying once in their life. And because they did not receive the help that they badly seek that time, they plot for revenge and bullies other people now that they can. They feel the need to make them experience the same thing they did because they think it's unfair for them.

What to Do and What They Need

Now, if you happen to see an act of violence such as bullying, I'm guessing that most of you will say that you'll jump and help the victim to stop the abuse. Yes, it is just right to stop it. But just stopping it that way can only help a little. What you need to do is seek for a professional help such as from the psychiatrist. Both of them need it. The victims need to get back the confidence and self-worth that they've lost. And the bully should learn that it's not the best thing to do and both will learn how to cope up with it and what to do next.

Bullying is dangerous, and it should be stopped no matter what. If you are the one being bullied, step up and don't let them treat you that way. If you are the bully, think of the time when you were the one being bullied. Don't let another person to go down there because you didn't like before and they definitely won't like it either. It's not their fault that you were bullied. And if you were not bullied then think if you will be. You won't like it either.


Abuse, Bully, Child, Children, Environment, Family, Problems, School, Victim, Violence

Meet the author

author avatar Black Butterfly
I write fictions in my free time and that is if my muse is present. I have cats and dogs as my babies.

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author avatar Sivaramakrishnan A
31st May 2015 (#)

Thought provoking take. I feel schools should have active counselling to bring bullying to the open, and guide the victims and the perpetrators. Almost all have had some bitter experience of bullying at some point in life, even in adult years - siva

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