My Journey

carly135 By carly135, 22nd Mar 2014 | Follow this author | RSS Feed | Short URL http://nut.bz/1n0pmto4/
Posted in Wikinut>Family>Domestic Violence & Abuse

domestic violence is not the key to life, we just need to find a way around it somehow

My journey

Always being alone and fighting for what I need
Trying to find myself to carry out the deed and always searching for the right garden to plant the seed
Trusting on it to give me what I need
From the start things weren't quite right, always wondering if id see the light
Always spending my time in the dark,
alone just looking and wishing for a place to call home
Most people have love surrounding them in every direction
While it seems im struggling to make a single connection
No matter where I turn, left or right there's no one really there for me
Day or night
walking this path alone has made me question
why am I here?
Is it a curse or a blessing?
The pain has made it so hard to carry onto the next day
Yet it has also made me stronger in each and every way
It hurts to know I was left by my own kind
I hate this shit it keeps fuckin' with my mind
But I try to stay strong and keep myself afloat, cause maybe my life will turn around or maybe it wont

Walking the streets looking for some affection
Feeling like a failure in a world full of perfection
Wanting to be understood by at least one person
Someone to put some sense into my actions and my cursin'
Everything I do is for a reason but its as if im a pitcher out of season
Always missing the opportunities that are important to me
being left on the street alone, a R-E-F-U-G-E-E
From all of the hate and care shown for me
I decide that maybe changing myself will be the best decision for me
I go out og my way to shape and perfect my image
Hoping someone will see it, and pay some homage
Not really sure what outcomes I expect to see
But im keeping my head up and hoping for some respect towards me
After all the hatred people have expressed
Im looking for a new start and hoping for the best
After changing parts of me for what I thought was best
I was disappointed to see that I failed to pass the test, I failed to become the person I sought out to be
After all of the hard work, there us still hatred towards me
Nothing has changed except for my raging emotions
It makes me upset and is starting to give me a notion
A notion that maybe I wasn't meant to have a place
A notion that wells up tears as I stare into the stars of deep space in the far depths of space
I see both light and dark
I see what the dark has done and the light that's sending out a spark
I've tried to many times to light the fire within me
Its always doused by the harsh conditions surrounding me
It seems as if I was meant to live my life alone
If only someone was here to appreciate and love me
It would help my Journey and see he who is above me

Tags

Daily Life, Hardships, Violence

Meet the author

author avatar carly135
I started writting when i was a kid, im now almost 23.Any advice to be better would be bentifical.

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Comments

author avatar Lady Aiyanna
23rd Mar 2014 (#)

Sorry to hear about your life. Well I have been a victim of Domestic Violence and still married to the man, but I am no streetwalker but a decent Corporate personnel with my own businesses in Creative Artistry and Management.
Husband and myself live apart to prevent him from going to prison as it is a police induced separation.

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author avatar Lady Aiyanna
23rd Mar 2014 (#)

Honestly, I don't want to see another man in my life.

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author avatar Sivaramakrishnan A
23rd Mar 2014 (#)

We all need acceptance within society and a fulfilling life - family life is give and take, but not one giving and the other taking. Nice poem Carly that resonates within me - siva

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author avatar carly135
23rd Mar 2014 (#)

Thanks everyone

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