Is the grass greener on the other side?

Mary Vlahakis By Mary Vlahakis, 3rd Oct 2014 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Family>Relationships

The early days of a relationship are filled with bliss. The feeling of excitement when he walks into the room. The hours of conversations and the feeling like that person is listening to you like no one has ever listened to you before. How long is that sustainable?

The Early years

Much like an infant finds overwhelming joy in the simple things, the same goes for couples in the early stages. There is so much information to share, getting to know someone and listening to every word that they say. Bright eyed and anxious to see that person again after saying good night. Thinking about the next time that you will see them and what you will talk about. Relationships follow cycles, much like everything else. A new job, a new friendship, a new car, a new toy etc. Is it not normal that the joy that you get from anything new slowly loses it's charm with time? Are we so short-sighted that we cannot acknowledge that such bliss is impossible to sustain and frankly unnatural?

Transition period

Every intense emotion must transition to something else. We cannot expect to sustain the intense feeling of a new relationship or any emotion. The same can be said about grieving or losing something that is dear to us. The intense feeling of lose and mourning cannot last forever otherwise we would not be living anymore. Everything is cyclical. If we hold onto to grief and sadness, then we will never feel joy and happiness again. Inversely, if we hang onto the excitement of a new relationship we will never transition into other emotions that are just as important.

Managing expectations

So then, it all becomes about managing expectations. If you expect that you will feel that overwhelming bliss that you felt early on in your relationship, than surely you will be disappointed. Those feeling must transition to something else. Once the newness goes away, it must be replaced with familiarity and your spouse, who was once a mystery and a novelty, now becomes your family. They become the person that you have chosen to build a life with. You will raise a family together and build a future for your children. You cannot expect the thrill and the excitement of the newness to continue. If that is what you are looking for, than your best bet is to stay in a relationship until that newness is gone, go through the break-up and the sorrow and then start all over again. Manage your expectations, that is the key.

Tags

Divorce, Life Choices, Marriage

Meet the author

author avatar Mary Vlahakis
I am a working mother of two. My writing will focus primarily on a variety of life experiences from my work life and my life as a working mom.

Share this page

moderator Mark Gordon Brown moderated this page.
If you have any complaints about this content, please let us know

Comments

author avatar Retired
3rd Oct 2014 (#)

That's not to say that love disappears, but that it matures into every day life. And one way to bring excitement in is to do new things together. This is an excellent article with a mature, logical perspective!

Reply to this comment

author avatar Mary Vlahakis
3rd Oct 2014 (#)

Thanks..you are so right. If the love was really there to begin with than it cannot disappear.

Reply to this comment

author avatar Retired
3rd Oct 2014 (#)

PS: Forgot to mention ... enjoyed your article enough to click and follow you. :)

Reply to this comment

author avatar Mary Vlahakis
3rd Oct 2014 (#)

Cool...I will follow you as well

Reply to this comment

author avatar Mccart
5th Oct 2014 (#)



Am here to testify what this great spell caster done for me. i never believe in spell casting, until when i was was tempted to try it. i and my husband have been having a lot of problem living together, he will always not make me happy because he have fallen in love with another lady outside our relationship, i tried my best to make sure that my husband leave this woman but the more i talk to him the more he makes me fell sad, so my marriage is now leading to divorce because he no longer gives me attention. so with all this pain and agony, i decided to contact this spell caster to see if things can work out between me and my husband again. this spell caster who was a woman told me that my husband is really under a great spell that he have been charm by some magic, so she told me that she was going to make all things normal back. she did the spell on my husband and after 5 days my husband changed completely he even apologize with the way he treated me that he was not him self, i really thank this woman her name is Dr Aluta she have bring back my husband back to me i want you all to contact her who are having any problem related to marriage issue and relationship problem she will solve it for you. her email is traditionalspellhospital@gmail.com she is a woman and she is great. wish you good time.

Reply to this comment

author avatar Wright
9th Dec 2014 (#)

Me and my husband have been trying for a baby for over three years now, We were going to a fertility clinic for about 8 months before somebody told us to contact this spell caster who is so powerful, We contacted him at this email arewaspecialistttemple@gmail.com I copied the email and I sent him a mail he replied me and I told me all my sorrow is over, but after three years of trying we were at a point where we were willing to try anything. And I'm glad we came to Dr Dahiru, Because his pregnancy spell cast put us at ease, and I honestly believe him, and his gods really helped us as well, I am thankful for all he has done, he then told me that I should wipe my tears with such comforting words he told me to buy some items that his going to use to cast the pregnancy spell I did and he made the spell for me and told me when next I meet with my husband I we conceive,at first I thought it was a scam but I just followed my inner mind and I sent the money for him to buy all the items after some months I went to check with my doctor and I was 4weeks pregnant, thanks to Dr Dahiru spell temple,I want to use this medium to tell everyone having similar problem. contact him via email: arewaspecialistttemple@gmail.com if you are trying to get a baby or want your lover back. he has powers to do it, he has done mine,

Reply to this comment

author avatar Frama
11th Jun 2015 (#)

Without DR DAHIRU a lot of people would have been dead through heart break. My case is not different from heart break, I am married woman with 3 kids and there was a time when i was having problem with my husband because he was having an affair outside our marriage and this was making me feel bad. So i tried finding solution to my problem by reading a lot of relationship tips on the internet and that was how i came in contact with DR DAHIRU contact details and through the help of DR DAHIRU at arewaspecialistttemple@gmail.com my husband left the girl he was having affair with and he came back to me and our kids. After a job well done by DR DAHIRU i felt that it will be unfair if i keep this secret to myself and that is why i am going to drop the contact details of DR DAHIRU right now,or you can also reach him via this email: arewaspecialistttemple@gmail.com

Reply to this comment

Add a comment
Username
Can't login?
Password