Helping Your Children Cope With Divorce

writersgeekinc By writersgeekinc, 13th Nov 2012 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Family>Divorce

interesting article about divorce in USA.Divorce rates

Helping Your Children Cope With Divorce

When parents are getting divorced, it's really important for them to sit down with their children. Parents should encourage their children to talk about what they are feeling and thinking. But you are going to need to keep the way that they feel separate from the way that you are feeling. A lot of times, the children are going to experience a feeling of losing their family. they also often are going to blame one of their parents, either you or your spouse, or even both. They feel that you are responsible for what is happening. That means that you should really be prepared for any questions that kids are going to have or to deal with the concerns that they have.


Discussing the divorce and the way that the children are affected should be something that is ongoing. As your children grow up and are more mature, they are often going to have concerns or questions that they didn't when they were younger. Even when it feels like you have gone over those topics in the past, be willing to talk to them. If you can, speak with your spouse to plan the way that you are going to talk to your children regarding what is happening.


It's possible that you are going to feel too upset to do it yourself. If this is the case, ask another person to speak with the children. It will be okay for your children to see you and your spouse upset or sad. But becoming really emotional may make the kids feel as if they are responsible for you and your spouse. Kid group problems for kids who have divorced parents can be really helpful. These often run by religious organizations or schools and they are a great resource for families and kids who are going through the pain of divorce.

Be prepared for your kids to have a lot of emotions about your divorce. The kids may feel guilty. They may even think that they caused your divorce. This often happens when kids have heard you and your spouse arguing when their name came up. Children and teenagers often feel might feel frightened or angry, or perhaps worry about the future.

Even though your children can struggle with the divorce for a while, the true impact usually is going to be felt over a period of 2 to 3 years. Through this time, some are going to be able to voice their own feelings. but others may not be able to do that, because of their age. They might act out instead of become depressed. For kids who are in school, you'll often see a drop in grades or a disinterest in activities at school that they used to love. For the younger kids, they often are going to express themselves when they are playing.

You may be tempted to tell your children that they shouldn't feel the way that they do. But they are feeling what they are feeling, and you can't tell them not to feel that. If you try and tell them that they are wrong, they may not show you the way that they are feeling.

Tags

Divorce, Divorce And Children, Divorce And Kids, Divorce Counselling

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