Guilty Innocence

DianaH By DianaH, 16th Feb 2011 | Follow this author | RSS Feed | Short URL
Posted in Wikinut>Family>Elderly Relatives

Grandma needed more care than we could give her. What would you do in this situation when there no more options?

Love for Grandma was never an issue. We just do.

Going to see my 87 year old Grandmother was harder than I thought. The family had to register into a nursing home. She needed more care than we could give her. She refused to live with anyone so we had no choice. We all did our best to give her what she needed when we could but that was never enough. We all love her and wanted to give her a comfortable place in her last days. She has cancer and the doctors can't do much for her. She wouldn't survive chemo or radiation and she refused these treatments. I would do the same if I was her age.

The Nursing Staff is very cooperative and understanding in the care Gram was to receive. In one breath she says they are doing all they can and in the next, they take too long helping her. We just can't win. We try to remind her that she is not the only patient in the facility, but that doesn't seem to enter into her mind. I have noticed that anyone living alone, tend to get self-centered, not to any fault of their own. That's just the way it gets when we are the only one we have to care for.

On my way home, I lost it. Crying while driving is not something I recommend. I tried to fight it but my tear ducts just wouldn't listen. This is now her reality. I hope I don't have to go to a Nursing Home, but the one Grandma's in is nice and clean. She is not happy with the fluids they give her. They have to be thickened in order for her throat to be coated and she doesn't cough so much. The mass in her throat causes her not to be able to eat solid food. Most of it has to be pureed, so for now, she is still losing weight. She won't listen to the radio or watch television. Doesn't want any silk flowers from home brought in. When she was told of her diagnosis, she said she lived a long life and she was tired. I don't blame her. I love her and hope that when she gets ready to go into her deep sleep, she goes peacefully. For now she is safe and is getting good care. This eases our minds for now.


Care, Grandmother, Nursing Home, Safe

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author avatar DianaH
I love poetry, crafts, spending time with friends, helping others with life, reading, playing cards.

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author avatar jocelyn
22nd Apr 2011 (#)

Wow..there's something about true life experiences that just touch you heart..thank you for sharing.

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author avatar Tranquilpen
24th Apr 2011 (#)

Thank you.

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