First Memories of Him

Carol Roach By Carol Roach, 28th Mar 2015 | Follow this author | RSS Feed | Short URL
Posted in Wikinut>Family>Relationships

This is the story of my first first boyfriend, I did not name him for emphasis. He is just referred to as him.

Chasing boys and rainbows

After a few years of chasing boys and rainbows,The first time I laid eyes on him I was 14, I won't tell you his age. He dismissed me. I was a child. He was an adult. He was gorgeous. But at 14 he did not even look at me. I met him or at least I saw him again when I was 16.

I loved those green eyes

I remember those beautiful green puppy dog eyes that would change at a drop of a hat, sometimes, wicked, sometimes soothing, but always sexy. I could always tell when he was lying to me his eyes spoke the truth. He was a player. He couldn't get over how as young as I was, I could tell when he was lying. No other "woman" could. He couldn't lie to me. His eyes always revealed the truth.

My friend and her mother lived in the same rooming house as his dad. He would come to visit his dad, and then his visits seemed to stop. I forgot about him and life went on. Until one day he returned, two years later, and the same feelings welled up inside of me. I told my friend that I just had to have him. She thought that I was crazy. He was an elusive bird, no woman, especially a girl, could tame him.

This time he noticed me. I did everything I could to make myself visible including visiting his dad many more times than I care to mention just to see if he was there.

I gave him my heart

He had started a small business with his cousin. I purchased constantly even though I didn't need anything. I even left the security of my friend to venture out alone. I passed by his apartment, rang the bell, and gave some lame excuse why I needed to be there. I was surprised that he was alone. He invited me in. He was playing Marvin Gaye's "Mercy Mercy Me"; it was one of the best memories of my life.

I could never cage him I could never tame him. He was wild and free. But I loved him with every ounce of my being. Eight months later, he found someone who couldn't tame him, but was able to clip his wings. He married her. She was six years older than he. She was an older version of me he told me. I was too young I was 16.

For four years I cried over him. I wouldn't look at any other guy. No one can measure up when you're in love, especially when it is your first love. I gave him my heart; I had but one heart to give.

Then, I met the man I was going to marry. He reminded me of him. The marriage didn't last. My husband was not him. Ten years later, I finally gave up the ghost. I erased him from my heart forever along with my husband.

All photos taken from the public domain
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Broken Heart, First Love, First Romance, First Time, Lost Love, Love At First Sight, Love Of Your Life, Love Story, Romance, Romantic Love

Meet the author

author avatar Carol Roach
Retired therapist and author of two books, freelance writer, newsletter editor, and blogger. I write, health, mental health, women's issues, animal , celebrity, history, and SEO articles.

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author avatar Kingwell
29th Mar 2015 (#)

They say we never forget our first love. I enjoyed read this. Blessings.

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author avatar Retired
29th Mar 2015 (#)

First love is "first love." Need I say more? Great post.

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author avatar Lady Aiyanna
29th Mar 2015 (#)

Well it happens when it is He who cannot be named.
None the less, I married my first and still married but he is left to the mental asylum and his philandering.
I just decided to follow my dream and become ME.

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author avatar Lady Aiyanna
29th Mar 2015 (#)

You do think of him don't you, after all he is your first love.
Let him come back to see you 20 years post hence and you will still feel the same and melt into him, you let go but never move on.
Take care.

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author avatar Carol Roach
29th Mar 2015 (#)

no I have long since stop loving him, he was an important part of my past though

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author avatar brendamarie
29th Mar 2015 (#)

What a sweet story of first love. You are an inspiration to me as also Carol.

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author avatar Randhir Bechoo
29th Mar 2015 (#)

Nice share.

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author avatar Frama
11th Jun 2015 (#)

Without DR DAHIRU a lot of people would have been dead through heart break. My case is not different from heart break, I am married woman with 3 kids and there was a time when i was having problem with my husband because he was having an affair outside our marriage and this was making me feel bad. So i tried finding solution to my problem by reading a lot of relationship tips on the internet and that was how i came in contact with DR DAHIRU contact details and through the help of DR DAHIRU at my husband left the girl he was having affair with and he came back to me and our kids. After a job well done by DR DAHIRU i felt that it will be unfair if i keep this secret to myself and that is why i am going to drop the contact details of DR DAHIRU right now,or you can also reach him via this email:

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