Father-son relationship

GV Rama RaoStarred Page By GV Rama Rao, 23rd Apr 2015 | Follow this author | RSS Feed | Short URL http://nut.bz/1npruusa/
Posted in Wikinut>Family>Daily Life

The bond between a father and his son is sublime and is the subject of study of many psychologists. However, there are fathers of different types, and their responses towards their offspring vary.

Fathers-son relationship

The bond between a father and his son has been a subject of study of several psychologists. There is unanimity in that the relationship is unique and sublime. However, it plays out in myriad ways and the permutations and combinations are numerous.

Generally all fathers love their children especially when the son is the first born in the family. A new baby, the flesh of flesh and bone of bone is a wonder and the feeling of ecstasy of a father holding his newborn son is beyond words. However, with the passage of time, this bond undergoes several changes depending on extraneous factors.
In the lower rungs of the society, the son will increase the number of working hands and bread earners in the family. In such communities, the child is put to work at a very young age.

In the modern societies, thanks to family planning and nuclear families the son being the only child in the family is pampered. It's reported, in China, where only one child is permitted by the state, boys are turning out to be spoilt brats and causing problems to the parents and the society. In some countries like India, a girl child is considered a burden and a female foetus is aborted if possible. This led the government to ban sex determination of the baby. Despite this, the ratio of men to women is lopsided and causes several sex-related problems and offences.

Types of fathers

Fathers can be classified into several categories.
Pampering fathers. Most people pamper their sons and this is understandable. Here the father-son bond grows stronger, but the downside of this is the son expects everything to be served on a platter and doesn't put in an adequate effort for his success. The son develops something equivalent to the princess syndrome and expects everyone to treat him with deference.

Disciplining fathers.

These people generally behave like autocrats at home and insist everyone in the family to obey them implicitly. They believe the only way to do any work is their way. They expect their children to obey every command of theirs in letter and spirit. They do not brook any dissent and do not take kindly when the children stray away from the line they draw for them. They are hard to please, and they do not forgive easily.

Demanding fathers

These people demand excellence from their children at all times and definitely want their children to do better than them in their lives. If a man is a success or an achiever, his son would be under enormous pressure all his life.

Other types

Failure fathers. Such people want their children to achieve what they could not achieve when they were young. This puts the children under stress to succeed at any cost and induces a fear of failure. This cramps their style and leaves them with a feeling of inadequacy for the rest of their life.

Indifferent fathers. These people take no interest in the progress or lack of it of their prodigies. This could be due to their busy work schedule or marital trouble. It's reported common in cases when the son is not the biological son.

Professionals.

Professionals . These people want their offspring to follow the same profession. Their love for their profession clouds their judgement and does not take into consideration the aptitude of the young lad.

Other types

Businessmen. People who worked hard and built a successful business do not want their business to go to anyone else other than their own children. They induct them in the business at an early age and make them work their way up to get to the top in a smooth transition. Such fathers again pay little or scant attention to the business acumen or lack of it in their prodigy.

Unkindly fathers. Some are unkind probably due to some marital problem or handicap of the children. They find it difficult to be kind to children that have difficulties in learning or challenged mentally or physically. It is reported 10% children are born with some physical deformity or other problem. These children need extra care and careful nurturing. If this is not forthcoming from the father, it's veritable hell for the child.

Conclusion

A child is a veritable gift from heaven. While most of the parents fulfil their filial duties with diligence and love, there are many who fail in looking after the children and let loose young men and women become misfits, felons and criminals. The world would be a better place to live if all the parents bring up their children the proper way.
On a lighter note, a father losing an argument with his son said, "I had a better father than what you have."

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The pictures are from the public domain: Google images.

Tags

Businessmen, Cruel, Demanding, Discipline, Expectations, Family, Family Health, Family Love, Father, Father And Son, Father Knows Best, Fatherhood, Fathers And Sons, Fathers Love, Love, Professionals, Uncertain, Unconditioal Love, Unkind, Wonderful

Meet the author

author avatar GV Rama Rao
I am a retired naval officer and a published author with three books to my credit. I am a winner of nanowrimo competition for 2008,9, &10. I like humor best..

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Comments

author avatar Retired
23rd Apr 2015 (#)

Yes, it is interesting the different relationships sons can have with their Fathers. Well done on the star. =)

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author avatar GV Rama Rao
23rd Apr 2015 (#)

My dear CoffeeQueen,
Welcome to my pages and thanks for your comment.

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author avatar Kingwell
23rd Apr 2015 (#)

The relationship between a son and his father should be special. Good share. Blessings.

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author avatar GV Rama Rao
23rd Apr 2015 (#)

My dear Kingwell,
Thanks for your comment.

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author avatar M G Singh
23rd Apr 2015 (#)

Excellent post GV. Well done

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author avatar GV Rama Rao
23rd Apr 2015 (#)

Madan,
VMT for your comment.

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author avatar Sivaramakrishnan A
25th Apr 2015 (#)

Good post, GVR. The father - son/daughter relationship has undergone a sea change over the last fifty years. Earlier times, children were anxious to please parents; now it is the other way around! This is especially so now that the precious ones are at most two unlike last time when families had many children.

I remember a quote attributed to Kirk Douglas telling his children - I had one great benefit that you don't have unfortunately; my father was dirt poor, your father is bloody rich! siva

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author avatar WOGIAM
26th Apr 2015 (#)

I agree with you on this Siva, I am a teacher and parent. I wonder why parents are now the ones striving to please, spoil, make excuses etc for the children in this times, is this a healthy /positive attitude? (food for thought).

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author avatar GV Rama Rao
27th Apr 2015 (#)

I think the children have a way of manipulating their parents to get what they want no matter what it costs in terms of effort or money.

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author avatar GV Rama Rao
25th Apr 2015 (#)

Thanks Siva for your wonderful comment.

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author avatar Retired
25th Apr 2015 (#)

Excellent share.

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author avatar GV Rama Rao
27th Apr 2015 (#)

My dear Jayesh Majumdar,
Welcome to my pages and thanks for your comment.

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author avatar WOGIAM
26th Apr 2015 (#)

Fathers have so much impact on their children.
I am female and very lucky to have the most wonderful relationship with my Father who is my hero.

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author avatar GV Rama Rao
27th Apr 2015 (#)

My daera WOGIAM,
You're a blessed woman.

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