Drinking Alcohol ( legal limit ) Reality check

SandraleeStarred Page By Sandralee, 4th Aug 2012 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Family>Teenagers

Alcoholism in my youth.... Reality in full effect as I see my children drink.
I used to sneak in bars and sit there with someone and act like I belonged there.
I got away with it from the age of 16.
No I am not proud of it and wish I could turn back the hands of time and recreate my life.
That is not reality.
Reality is that I drank to fit in to be accepted to be a part of the crowd.
That was my reality.

Here lets buy a round for the house.....

This is me in the blue, and my baby sister almost 10 years younger than myself.
She wanted to be around me all the time following me all over the place every where I went she would tag along. What kid would not like to do what I was doing.
Go out with the gang, Drink smoke some Weed and have a lot of fun...
Till over doing it resulted in puking my guts out swearing never to drink that much again only to be right there with the Gang when they were ready to party.
SEX DRUGS MEN AND LIQUOR. MY MOTTO DRINK TILL YOU DROP.
Who cared back in the 70's.even into the 80,s . Party like a rock star... yeah that was a time in my life I wish I could forget.

A fire losing it all but then.....

So drinking and weed and cocaine were my party drugs. After my 2 nd child was about 4 we lost everything in a fire. Gutted and left to live in a van. Did I learn from that .... No We went right along doing the same thing dragging 2 children right along with us .....
Then
.......Now it is 2012 my children ... raised by their father... Are they destined to follow my past ... I think they are. It is a problem in society to glamorize drinking and partying. The normal thing for kids to do ,Spring Break, Clubbing, Dancing, Private parties and parents that are themselves a problem taking their children down the road to alcoholism with them.
I made a decision 7 years ago that my son would not bail me out of Jail till I decided to get clean and sober. 5 days in jail and I was ready to agree to anything to get out.

After prison

I spent 10 1/2 months in prison. I had been collecting welfare for my son while he was in and out of the system. Detention home and care homes for his anger problems.
I was off welfare for 2 years and one day there was a call to my phone. How they got my number is still a question yet without an answer.
The authorities located me working for my son and his inlaws. they arrested me got a grand jury indictment and there I went off to prison.
I was still using drugs and when they took me to court I was too stoned to really grasp how to defend myself.
So I stayed in Prison and spent my time getting clean and learning about life and how to live drug free.

My reward

After getting released I was put into a rehab house with other women I eventually left but have stayed clean and sober since 2004.
My oldest son died 7 months after I was released. My reward was to lose my son to hanging, they found traces of marijuana and cocaine in his system. My first look at my grandaughter was when she was 1 month old. My oldest son dead....
3 years later this photo was taken .
So when you think about giving things to kids even your own remember that there will come a time when you will not be there for them.
Set an example for them and moderation in alcohol for your self.
They will eventually be old enough to drink.
They will make choices and then you will still worry.
So If I have offended you please forgive me.
I do not make excuses and no I did not give the drugs and alcohol to my son.
I was in a recovery house, and not there for him when he needed me most.

Tags

Alcohol, Alcohol Abuse, Alcohol Addiction, Alcoholic, Alcoholic Mother, Alcoholism, Children, Father

Meet the author

author avatar Sandralee
The love for my children drives me to leave a legacy of hope and faith, a desire to attain the highest goals and never limit their chances to learn and grow.

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Comments

author avatar Sivaramakrishnan A
4th Aug 2012 (#)

Very touching life story, Sandra. I feel for your loss. I have taken care to set an example to my son and it is much easier than we think. It should become a habit. There are so many better things in life - siva

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author avatar Sandralee
4th Aug 2012 (#)

so true Siva Thank vyou

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author avatar LOVERME
5th Aug 2012 (#)



CONGRATS FOR THE STAR

I WONDER
when and what will happen once i get a STAR
will i also be seen as a poet by all so far
my ...
so many read me daily here but does wikinut know me my dear

What a star not even a penny's worth am i at all
my dear..
still poems
i compose and even strangers copy plagiarise
compose upon it
can WIKI NUTS hear..

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author avatar Sandralee
6th Aug 2012 (#)

I am sure that one a Star is earned it will make you as pelapela wish my efforts that in my selu the expressions written from my heart .

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author avatar LOVERME
5th Aug 2012 (#)

do you know all guys and gals
get off the rails
when their testosterone in ......
rest read at my place unfair here...

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author avatar Denise O
5th Aug 2012 (#)

Ignore loverme, I do. Hon the courage it has taken for you to place your story in print is beyond belief, it is sure to help many. I applaud you. I know no words will ever take away your pain but, I am so sorry you lost your son, my heart is breaking. God bless you hon. Thank you for sharing.:)

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author avatar Sandralee
6th Aug 2012 (#)

Tanika You Johnnydod for the Star. I RealAudio am so very happy about this achievment.

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author avatar writestuff
6th Aug 2012 (#)

Kudos to you. Keep, sober and keep pulling yourself up!! I empathize with you. It takes courage to bare one's pain. In time it will lessen but it will always tug at a mother's heart. Have you given any thought to becoming a Substance Abuse Counselor? You'd be great!!!

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author avatar Sandralee
7th Aug 2012 (#)

At times I have considered it to work with kids would be where I would like to focus.
Thanks writestuff for the thought provoking idea

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