Components of Limerence

ashart By ashart, 3rd May 2015 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Family>Relationships

Discussing more about the components of Limerence and going in depth about the different aspects.


In my previous article, "What Exactly is "Limerence"?, I have discussed and talked about what is the meaning of Limerence. In this article, I'm going to talk about the three main components of Limerence and the feelings you go through when Limerence hits you.

Intrusive Thinking

"The most surprising thing of all about love is the first step, the violence of the change that takes place in mind... A person in love is unremittingly and uninterruptedly occupied with the image of beloved."

When limerence happens, a person will always have the image of the one they love in their head. This is called intrusive thinking which basically means that the person you love will always appear in your mind. The person of your passionate desire is also called the limerent object. "During the earliest stages of limerence, those who are experiencing it may sense only a generally longing for love and may vacillate between two or more possible limerent objects.", this means at the start, person may developed feelings for a few person but as time goes by, when the limerence for a certain person is fully developed, they will only focus on that certain person and no longer think of others as potential partners.

Fear of Rejection

"The pleasure of love are always in proportion to the fear."

In love, the amount of happiness is always balanced with the amount of fear. "You fear that your limerence will be met by the very opposite of reciprocity: rejection", one will be afraid that their feelings will be rejected by their limerent object. When a person is limerent, their emotions will be affected greatly, "when limerent, you are fearful, apprehensive, nervous, anxious - terribly worried that your own actions may bring about disaster.". For example, a person will be very nervous when they called their limerent object on the phone. The moment the limerent object picks up the call, the person's mind will go blank even if he or she had gone over the whole conversation in his or her head beforehand and whatever he or she say will never seem to come out right.

Physical Effects

"The physiological correlations of limerence are heart palpitations, trembling, pallor, flushing, pupil dilation and general weakness. Awkwardness, stuttering, shyness, confusion predominate at the behavioral level. There may be sickness, headaches, etc., and loss of appetite, dizziness and passing out: the latter very rarely happens, but can take place when the person is deeply in love with the limerent object."

There will be physical effects as well. In simple words, we will have butterflies in our stomach as what most people will describe. There will be awkward moments between you and the limerent object because it is due to the previous component. You are afraid that any actions or words will jeopardise the friendship or spoils the atmosphere.


Componenets, Fear Of Rejection, Intrusive Thinking, Limerence, Physical Effects

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author avatar Carol Roach
7th May 2015 (#)

very interesting

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author avatar Frama
11th Jun 2015 (#)

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