Being born isn't enough

vickylass By vickylass, 17th Oct 2015 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Family>Parenting

It all depends what we experience in childhood to be happy adults.

Being born isn't enough

The Guardian (October 17th) have asked several people to say what they think a happy childhood should be and almost all of them tell us the obvious -a child needs to feel that he or she was wanted and is loved. Here are some of the cases I know.


One of my friend's daughter decided to have a child with her boyfriend, but while the boyfriend would love the three of them to live together, she hasn't made up her mind about the issue. Thus, the child is being taken into one place to another as though he was an object. This child spends more time at his grandmother's place than he spends at his own one with his mother and father. I always say when this child becomes a teenager and, later on, an adult, he'll be one with lots of problems to interact with other people and to succeed in his life, if not he takes on hooliganism path, because what a child needs most besides being wanted and loved is stability.


Another friend decided to have a child when she was well into her thirties. The father was an alcoholic and, therefore, he wouldn't mind the child. Thus, The mother had her custody, but by the looks of the way she treated the girl, it was obvious that that child was too big a burden on her shoulders. I don't remember a moment when mother and child talked amiably or went out together, but on the contrary, she craved to free herself from the child. It is true that she provided her child with a place to live, food, schooling, but in my opinion, the child lacked a close relationship with her mother. This sort of relationship that will comfort us in adulthood.


I was very small when my father emigrated in search for better living for the four of us, but his plans went wrong and we never saw our father again. My mother tried her best to provide with our basic things, but busy as she was working away, she missed to create a close bond with us. My sister is a lot more extrovert than I am. Therefore, she found her way to make friends till she married. On the contrary, I was way too shy to interact and I had few friends. I was always at home, doing my own things. Thus, I grew up way too close to my mother when, in fact, all what she wanted was to pick a novel and rest after her work. In my lonely evenings, I always wonder what our lives would have been like if my father hadn't have to emigrate.

I always say that it all depends how we have it in childhood to have a happy life in adulthood.

© Copyright. Vicky Pino. October 17th 2015.


Bond, Child, Father, Mother, Relationship

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Feature article writer whose motto is that inspiration does exist, but it has to meet us at work.

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author avatar Fern Mc Costigan
18th Oct 2015 (#)

Nice post!

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author avatar Vicky Herrington
4th Nov 2015 (#)

I agree with Fern... Nice post Vickylass. :-)

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