How to Talk to Your Venerable Teenager.
A teenager is not a child or an adult and this can be a very difficult transitional period for an individual as well as the parent or guardian. Being able to talk about issues is very important at this time.
To error is to human and we live this life and make so many mistakes as we go along and I guess the best part is that we learn through the experience.
I remember how being a teenager was difficult for me trying to fit in and accepting the changes that it brought to my body and the new emotions that I experienced and I wish that someone took the time to talk to me.
There is a teenager who comes to our office and I have been noticing how much he has been struggling especially with his dressing code and I have been chatting him up trying to encourage him to be confident in himself.
I have found out that all it takes is to talk to a teenager like an adult and respect their opinion even though you do not agree with it and let there be room for discussion.
Here are some of the guidelines to observe to keep your teenager talking to you no matter what the topic.
i) Create an open door policy and let them know that no matter what they have done you love them and they can come to you and together you will come up with a solution.
ii) However agitated you get, please don’t yell at your teen because that will only make him or her withdraw from you for fear of being shouted at.
iii) If you are discussion on a particular matter highlight on the consequences and let them be fully informed. A good example here would be on your teen wanting to start dating. Just saying no will actually make the teen do it behind your back, teach them about the beauty of dating as well as the consequences when that is not done right and let them know that you trust them to come to you whatever they decide.
iv) One of the other challenges affecting the teenager is the dress code, maybe piercings and tattoos. Saying no here may actually push the teen to go against you out of rebellion and suggesting that they get temporary tattoos or clip on for earring may actually work until that phase passes.
v) Don’t forget to praise your teen when they accomplish something good whether in school or just helping around the house.
vi) Don’t snoop in your teenagers things as this will only make them more secretative. When they have company in their rooms ensure that the door is kept open and try to engage with them.
It is a good thing that the teenage years pass by quickly and then things can go back to normal.
As a parent try your level best not to be offended by most of the behavior that the teen may develop. Some teenager just withdraw into themselves and crave a lot of privacy while other can be very quick to anger, who ever your teen is just love them through this.